A pretty good update of my life.

Greetings!

Now it looks like I'm writing in my diary again. It's all thanks to Hodgson. He is my hot sexy white internet man. Not to be confused with my hot sexy real-life not-boyfriend man. Yeah, hodgson is a pretty cool guy. I've been chatting with him via AIM for a while, and he's a nice guy. I've learned way more about him via IM than I could ever through his diary. Which everyone should visit.

Anyway, getting back to my life, which is what I visit diaryland to talk about....

People are joining my DoReMi thingy. I really didn't expect many people to figure out what the hell it was about. I bet you anything there's some girl who's pissed off that the Doremi diary-ring isn't about music, but "Some goddamned japaneese cartoon." That thought makes me laugh.

A lot of thoughts make me laugh. I've been doing a lot of laughing as of late. I don't know wheather that means that I'm crazy, depressed, or if I'm really happy. Only the gods know. Speaking of gods, did you know that Anita is the god of the CABs? (Cheap Ass BAstards) heh. Anita is in my glossary, but it relfects my first impression of her, which was her being a real bitch to me. She's actually very nice. Well... when she wants to be. I need to get around to editng my Glossary, mostly because of shit like that. First impressions change. Contrary to common belief, I'm a very open minded person. So if you fuck up the day I meet you, then I doubt I'll hate you forever.

And then there's my love life.

Okay it was a shitty segway, but I don't really care. No one reads my diary when I don't update it often, and that really doesn't hurt my feelings at all. In fact, I respect that there aren't any losers reading my diary over and over again. I'm not famous. Not yet anyway. I'm working on that.

One day I'll be famouser than Gwen Stefani. OH, by the way, if my layout wasn't encouragment enough, go buy Rock Steady, the new CD by No Doubt. It kicks ass. Well, don't buy it if you don't like no doubt, because then you'd just be like "That internet bitch told me to get no doubt, and I still don't like them!" Ah well.

so, love life...

Yes, I have no love life right now. It's all just one huge hypothetical situation. Hypothetically (I'm sure I'm spelling that one wrong)Frank and I could be boyfriend and girlfriend. Hypothetically I could get back with mr X (Who won't be mentioned in full name on my diary in relation to him being my boyfriend anymore.) But neither of those things are going to happen. Why you ask? Well, I'm tired of mr X, and Frank has a girlfriend. I think I've outlined both of these items fairly well in the past, and there's no need for me to go over them exstensivly.

Every time that I decide that I'm not going to persue frank any longer, I end up spending an extended amount of time with him, and I'm reminded of how much I like the guy. God damnit. The bigger problem in this picture is that I don't want to be lonely. I'm not a lonely person --per se. I have tons of friends, and most of them live in south philly these days. Even leighann moved to south philly. She lives literally three blocks away. It's just this whole not having a boyfriend deal gets tired. I enjoy my flirting freedom, but I have a feeling that's going to get really old, really quick.

I'm in a really messed up place. I know it has to seem like I'm writing the same exact paragraphs day in and day out, but the thing there is, that I really am thinking these same ideas every day. Does that make me a sad person? No, that makes me smart. I'm a thinking sign. I think about things before I jump in and make a huge ass of myself, and fuck everything up for everyone. So I'm doing a lot of thinking for this situation, because it's fairly difficult. It isn't like this guy has an issue with having an interracial relationship. (Did I mention that frank was blondish with blue eyes? OH yeah... heh) He has a girlfriend. A girlfriend that he spends no time with at all. He spends most of his time with me and his friend John. Well, and work too. But that doesn't count.

So this all equates to one big problemo. I gets no play, and he gets popped into a fairly shitty situation where he has to make a choice. A choice that I know he really doesn't want to have to make, but he has to anyway. Plus I can see from current events that I'm his choice. If it were the other way around, he'd be with the other chick all the time. But is he? Nope. He makes jokes with me. He talks to me. Me me me. Mmmm hmm.

He'd better not do that to me. LOL, because I don't tolerate cheating. That's why I'm trying to keep him as pletonic as possible (Spelled wrong, I suppose, but who;s counting?)

So I rock steady. Rock steady. Until the next time....

Love and adoration,

Pammie