Uber-pam-- the protector of humans

I NEED A BOYFRIEND.

Okay, well maybe not need a boyfriend, but I sure could use one. I need a man who will be both my friend, my lover (a good lover would be helpful, because I'm not in the mood for bad sex) and an intelectioal compainion. I have all of that (excluding the lover thing) in a lot of my male friends. Only about one of them am I attracted to.

I'm so busy helping other people these days, that I'm starting to lose wind of myself. I'm busy being a superhero to tons of people and supporting women's rights. Like, very busy...

I'm helping John make realizations. I'm being his friend, and listening to him talk about his relationship (for real, man, I'm on the phone with the motherfucker right now.)

I have been helping Tiffany with the problems in her life-- some of which I've been through-- and being her friend, which is easy. I really like Tiff alot. We're a lot alike-- and in some pretty creepy ways.

I'm trying to help anita realize that she needs to calm down a little bit and not work so hard. She stresses herself out so badly. She doesn't listen to much that I say, but I think she really wants to calm down in her life.

I need me time. I'm seriously taking every monday off from fucking with any people. I don't want to be friendly at work, I don't want to do shit invovling human beings when I get home. I don't even want to talk on the phone. There is so much demand for me, but I don't get anything but friends.

This is getting really fucking tired. I'm really fucking tired... no, really, I'm sleepy. I didn't get to bed last night until like 3, then I woke back up this morning around 9 because tiffany needed me. I feel like I'm a goddamn mom. Like, *yawn*, children love me, and I love them, but these adults take the cake. Oy.

Well, I don't have much in the way of amusing things to say, 'cause I really need a relationship. Every human needs someone, and I am human. I want to be loved, really, really, loved. John'd gladly love me, but goddamnit, that's not what I want. John whines. John bitches. John is not potential boyfriend matierial.

In conversation he just went "Why do you like..." potentially refering to his best friend. GOD DAMNIT. I don't want this sometimes. I don't want to be reliable, I don't want a good friend. I want to be a bitch some days, but I realize that I like being me. What a bind I place myself in.

Well, I'll give better entry after I get some damn rest. Go sign my guest book and make me feel loved in place of the empty belly button hole that I have left. Wow, run on sentance ness.

Love and adoration, but none for me right now,

pam