I want a healthy lunch... and uh.. Kawaii desu ne?

Aren�t I cute?

Yeah, that�s me, on the left circa summer of �81. I was a big, fat baby. At 5 months, I was talking, walking...falling... talking, and confusing people. Not much has changed between June of 81 and June of �03.

Except for the falling part. Well, and the rest of the world. But doesn�t the world revolve around me? Oh... yeah, that�s only in my mind. Heh.

So, yup, a layout change. That image is kinda big, and huge, just like me as a baby! I don�t have any access to image editing software. :-P Anyway, switching out an image is bearly a �layout change.� Whatever. I�ve been hurrassing my mom for weeks to scan that picture. Now I have it. Yay! The orignal is in color, but whatever, it�s cute in black and white too.

Maybe that should be my new hunt-- seeking out baby pictures of all my friends. I think that�d be awesome. It�s fun to look at people you know, and then see their baby pictures. I�m entertained by seeing my friends all fat, and little.

Speaking of fat, I didn�t eat greasy food today for lunch! I�m so happy. I had some rice, chicken, and this yummy spicy sauce from the Chinees food truck accross the street from my job. It�s not really what I wanted (a salad with chicken and cheese... mmm) but it was better than a damn cheeseburger. Sarah goes to the whole foods market on 19th street and gets the yummiest spreads, and this wheat pita bread that kicks so much ass it should be illegal. I miss eating healthy food. It just always seems like there isn�t any healthy food near me.

As much as a peice of me really likes eating greasy food, a bigger peice of me just wants a salad, and some veggies. Yeah, I want meat, because that whole vegitarian thing doesn�t work very well for me. Well, I�m going to try to eat a little healthier now that I�ll have money on a regular basis. Until I go shopping, I�m just going to bum some of Sarahs� tasty veggie spread and eat my banana. If that isn�t an orgy of food, I don�t know what is.

Oh, here�s a bit of news for you. Amanda is in the process of being dicked out of a trip to an anime convention in Baltimore by her skanky friends. Well, I don� t know if the girls are skanky. I�ve never met them, but anyone who would disapoint sweet, sweet lil� Amanda deserves some sort of negitive monicar. So, as I read her journal this afternoon, I thought-- Hey, I like anime conventions! If they won�t go, I�ll go! So I may get roped (willingly) into going to an anime convention in August.

I had been thinking about going to Baltimore anyway, but not for an anime convention. Hell, I wasn�t thinking about going to Jersey this summer, but not for an anime convention. There�s one in Newark or something like that every year. Anime has not been on the top of my obsession priority list lately, either. In fact, I haven�t seen a new anime in ages. As I considered going to this anime convention, which I probabally will if Amanda really needs me to go, I realized why I don�t dig anime like I used to.

It�s too damn cool now.

When anime was an underground, and partially illegal form of entertainment, I loved it. Then Saior Moon went all Cartoon Network, Card Captor Sakura became uber-famous, and Yuu-gi-o pretty much sealed the deal. Now, I�m in no way trying to project an image of anime being a cool hoby. It isn�t. It�s too popular for me to really dig it like I used to. The DVDs that I have, I enjoy... the ones that I didn�t sell back to Game stop for like, a dollar, lol. I also have some anime toys which I love dearly, because most of them have a story attached to �em. The search for quality anime isn�t as difficult anymore either. I liked having to search around, do research and make phone calls to find that new episode of escaflone. Now, I could just go to Best Buy and buy the DVD Box Set. Meh.The near future may bring an anime convention, but what�s so anime about me anymore?

Not much.

Well, I doubt I�ll cosplay, because I�m really too lazy to make a costume, and deep down I fear the ridicule of my current peers. You know what, that statment alone really makes me wanna cosplay. I shouldn�t care what anyone else thinks. I guess if I can pay someone else to make me a costume, I�ll cosplay. LMAO, I�m such a geek. If I attend this convention, I will bring a camera, and take lots of pictures of people dressed up like anime characters. I love that shit.

Who knows, I might not go anyway. It would be a great excuse to hang with Amanda (without that annoying, dickheaded little pesk who lives in boston) for a weekend, though. I don�t see her often enough.

I�d like to go to baltimore before then, and I�m in the process of planning that trip as we speak. Well, not like, this very second, and we aren�t really talking right now... but well... you get me.

Update anyone?

Uh, yesterday... what did I do? Oh yeah, I left work and went home. Upon arriving at my apartment, I turned on my air conditioners (it gets really hot in there!!) took me a shower, and went to sleep. I should have been born mexican, becuase I fit that �Heat makes me tired� sterotype to a T. I�m a lazy person to begin with, but heat only multiplies my desire to do nothing with my day.

So I gots my nap on, and when I woke up, I did what�s natural. I wiped the crust outta my eye and called my boyfriend. :-D He�s awesome. We talked about his interview, and I really have my fingers crossed on this one, becuase he sounds really excited. Yay! *crosses fingers*

it is very difclt to tpe lk ths

Okay fuck that, I�ll cross my tounge instead. Or maybe I should type with my tounge and keep my fingers crossed... hmm.

Oooh!! My Beyonce� song is on!! Yay! Every time I hear this song, i really wanna dance. I am again shaking my ass. *left, right, left, right* Yay! :-D

Right.

So.... My evening was pretty exciting otherwise. I stayed in the house. I played with my hair, read a little, wrote a little, and practiced my singing... I wrote a couple of songs, which make me laugh, and I can�t get all the way through them. I�m startng to understand the songwriting process a little better... Maybe I�ll get a book on songwriting or something. The only book I have on music is the workbook that I have from Cristina Guzman... but that�s about reading music. Meh.

I don�t know why I bother writing songs sometimes, because I don�t ever really sing them aloud to anyone but myself. Although it�s a self-serving process, I would like to entertain other people and I really wanna show off what I�ve done, but I know I�d be all embarrassed. WOW, that was deep, I just said I�d be embarrassed about something, and kinda meant it! Wow, can I get a gold star?

I get embarrassed sometimes. Honest. I�m much better at embarrasing other people though.

Okay, time to go home is getting closer, so I�m going to end this now. Oooh, now Christina (I say cristina, like she�s my friend or something, lol) is singing Fighter-- I like that song too. :-D Yay music! Okay, I�m really done now. Have yourself a kick-ass day, and an ass-whoopin� tomorrow.

Love and adoration,

Pam,

Circa summer of 03... not quite as fat, but still kinda cute.