I'm too sexy for my... uh... yeah.

Oh man,

It's days like today that make my job so much fun. I was very busy this morning, and got a ton of work done. Well, let me take you on a rewind trip first.

Yesterday, I got paid for my efforts at EDU. Yay! I decided that getting an X-box right now would be stupid, and I need furniture more. So mom took me to this place where everything is painfully cheap. I saw a couch on sale for less than a hundred bucks. Hell the fuck yeah. We couldn't take it with us, though, because I had to go up to the northeast to have a meeting with Cristina.

At the Cristina meeting, we covered our global domination plans, as well as plans to make me famous. Star search is starting up again, and she wants me to come with her, and a small group, to the auditions. Also, next Friday, I'm going to try out for the Philadelphia Idol contest. I'll have to take the day off to do it, though. Yeah, Me and Kelly Clarkson, doing a duo. Hell yeah.

After the shortest Pam & Cristina meeting ever, mom drove me home. At this point it was like 11 or so. I do my coming home routine, remove some clothes, feed the cat, get on the internet, play video games. Yesterday's trip to game stop brought Mario Party 4 and Need for Speed 2: Hot Pursuit into my apartment. Both are kick ass games. Need for Speed is so much fun, and Mario party kicks big ol' fat ass.

Frank called me, and Crazian John called me, and it was a rather telephone-sociable evening. I had a lot of fun playing Mario Party 4, among other things. I spent some quality time online after my Frank n' John conversationness, chatting online with Wil, and Gabichan for a little while. I'm feelin' some type of way that gabichan pretty much said that there's nothin' too raw for my journal. She's about right. That made me chuckle, because lately I've been omitting a lot from this thing, for the sake of humanity.

Daath and Wil are, strangely, my top two choices for advice on how to converse with the male side of the species. So if you want me to do something stupid, pay one of them off to convince me to do something weird. I might even do it. Daath has been a sweetie lately. He just got some Novocain added into his system, so he's a little woozy in general. Great guy.

I didn't get around to going to bed until like, 3am. I wasn't even really tired. I even woke up early/on time this morning. It was almost as if I had great sex last night or something. I didn't, though. I didn't even have bad sex last night.
This little Pammie went to game stop, this little Pammie stayed home, this little Pammie had great sex, this little Pammie had none. This little Pammie went weeeeeeee weeeeeeee weeeeeeee! all the way home.

Okay, I thought it was clever. So sue me. Well, not clever... Maybe cute? Alright, I admit, that wee thing is totally corny.

It's hard trying to remember how to be sexy. I mean, not that it's difficult being sexy. Scorpio rising kind of forces the ambient sexual nature upon even innocent Aquarians, such as myself. I guess that's why everyone is under this impression that I'm this hot sexy chick. I'm a geek, folks. Through and through. I like to think that' I'm pretty good in bed, but ya know, don't we all?

It's just the idea- the concept of getting laid, is much more than just having arousing someone, moving your hips, and getting your orgasm on. No, really, it is.

Yes.

I've still got it.

That's all I have to say about that... That was a personal note. Sorry. I doubt any human being will get that. But hey, it is my diary after all.

Love and adoration,

Pam

Written, Wednesday, Oct. 23, 2002 at around: 1:33 PM

Pop goes the Pammie

I got POP.

which musicgenre fits to you?

Love and adoration,

Pam

Written, Monday, Oct. 21, 2002 at around: 3:07 PM

it's been a while, my bad

I have like, four entries that I wrote last week that never got posted. I'm pretty lazy like that sometimes. I'll post them when I remember.

In this entry I make a lot of references to people-- if you don't get who the fuck they are, read my glossary and figure it out.

Well, not too much has changed. My life is still the same. I chatted with Wil last night, and it reminded me why he's my friend. Wil is a great guy, a smidgen on the perverted side, but great guy nonetheless.

I gave him a real-time update on the not-boyfriend situation. He, like every other person on the east coast, completely supports my pursuits of said not-boyfriend. Wil also suggested that I become his and Gabi's girlfriend. Riiight. I have enough trouble maintaining a relationship that hasn't even become a relationship yet, and he wants to explore bodies with me, and his girlfriend? No, I don't think I could handle that.

Besides, I'm in Like with Frank, so's I ain't got the time for all that stuff. I stole that whole, "In like with *insert human's name here*" phrase from Erica. She's like a cool older sister, or an aunt or something. None of my relatives are cool. None of them. At least not the half of the family that I see all the time. They actually all kinda suck.

Hmm, that whole life being the same thing was a lie. I've started a diet. It's the scariest thing ever. Ever. Well, maybe not. I have always just eaten whatever I wanted, and it's strange to think about what I'm eating all the time. I need to go from a size 10 all the way back to a size 5 by march. I am going to die. Either that, or Wolf Street Pizza is going to go the fuck out of business.

This is not really my idea. This was Cristina's idea. I told her that being Miss Philadelphia would be great, so she's telling me everything I need to do to secure the win. Losing the flab is a big part of that. So is getting my hair done twice a month, getting my split ends cut, and getting my eyebrows waxed. Damn, man. Getting your eyebrows waxed hurts like hell. First some lady puts hot fucking wax on your face-- on the most sensitive place-- your eyelids, and then she proceeds to rip the wax off of your face, along with any hairs underneath. OW. It isn't natural, but if it's gonna give me the opportunity to attend Temple for free this fall, I'm down.

So I'm going back to school, helping Cristina along on this master plan of hers for global domination, preparing for winning Miss Philadelphia, and putting serious effort into my singing/acting career. See, and you thought when I said I'd be famous by the time I was 23 that I was full of shit. Well... So did I for that matter.

One year, Three months, and counting.

I want better. I don't want to be making 30 grand again next year. I want at least twice that, man. I can't afford to be myself. I need to buy some damn furniture. I've been living in this apartment for well over a year, and I still haven't bought any furniture, beside my bed. If I had no friends, I'd gladly sit on the floor to watch TV. But they come over, and I want them to be comfortable. See, my friends are most important to me.

Well, I need to get some more work done before I leave for community college of Philadelphia. Ta Ta! Oh, hey! *laugh*, Gabi used my closing statement a couple of days ago. It was pretty cool. Keep on kicking out the jams, gabi!!

Love and adoration,

Pam

Written, Tuesday, Oct. 15, 2002 at around: 4:42 PM

*insert entry title here*

An interesting day this has been...

I'm actually starting to behave like a grown up. Making apologies, owning up where I was wrong, making appointments, and swallowing my pride have all been a part of my day today. Between working with Cristina, and shortly Frank, on this project and taking a bit more responsibility for my own job, this has been a great day.

I've even called up Mindy from John Robert Powers, and made an appointment to speak to her, and pay the school the money I owe them. When I was 18 I made some lousy life decisions (like most humans) and I totally burnt my bridges with this woman. Mindy is this amazing, strong, intelligent woman. She runs a modeling school and agency, and she does it well. Whatever they're paying her isn't enough.

I started acting out, and once those issues had to be faced, I turned my back on JRP, and never looked back. Mindy was always there for me, and she really wanted me to excel, but I was an asshole, what can I say? Now I'm less of an asshole, and looking to rebuild some bridges. It's going to take a long time, but I might just be able to apologize properly.

I'm keeping these fingers crossed.

The not-boyfriend and I have been talking a lot lately. Not like, "every day" a lot. More like, 'good conversation' a lot. He is so funny. Great guy, all around. Okay, enough with the monosylabellic adjectives and the fragment sentences. I'm starting to officially get scared. Scared, as in afraid of falling in love. I haven't done that in a while, and this is so not the time for me to fall in love with him. Damn that timing.

So, I know he likes me. It was always there, but a small amount of self confidence will always kick the ass of facts. Trust me. I just worry about stuff like that. Being liked is the most important thing that exists in the Pam universe.

Well, I'm going to take my supposedly self-assured self home. I feel like a cold is coming on. Let's hope not, I have way too much stuff to do.

Love and adoration,

Pam

Written, Monday, Oct. 14, 2002 at around: 3:43 PM

I was pam's about-me test

How well do you know Pam?

Well, well, well. The test has ended, and 24 people took it. I've already created a new one, which you can take using that same link up there. Below I've listed the tops scores, and I commend everyone who's taken the test, and a special shout out goes to everyone who made the top ten and stayed there!

Oh, and a quick note about mike getting the top score... He actually requested to take the test again. This was, of course, after he saw what all the answers were. I considered taking him off the list, but I realized he'd just keep taking the test. Bastard. His original score was 70.

Thanks again to everyone who took this half of the month's test. I also want to say good luck to everyone who's going to take the second test!

Test takers:
1. mikeagain 100

2. Pam!!! 100

3. Cartman 80

4. Amanda! 80

5. monica 70

6. Samantha-m 70

7. ,, 70

8. minty 70

9. Frank 60

10. milky 50

11. Weeno 50

12. John 50

13. Shereen 40

14. Drew 40

15. Vashious 40

16. Daathums 40

17. LB 40

18. Alissa 30

19. Trice 30

20. =) 30

21. GLait 30

22. D 30

23. JohnnyCash 20

24. James 20

Love and adoration,

Pam

Written, Monday, Oct. 14, 2002 at around: 12:12 PM

Ha ha, I know and you don't.

Okay, I'm at work, and I'm actually busy!

So of course, I'll gladly take some time out of my day to write a journal entry. Hey, busy at my job is considered to be a moderate pace at most other jobs. It's truly days like this that make this job at all enjoyable. Monday, sadly, is the best day of the week here. There's lots to do, and many things to take care of. Mostly I'm just acquiring information about what happened during the last week, and all the motherfuckers that I tried to get in touch with earlier in the week are now trying to get back in touch with me. This means many appointments are scheduled, and I get interrupted a lot.

Here's something very funny, and completely unrelated to that last paragraph. Yes, my segways have come down to shit like that last sentence. Anyway-- The first entry on this blog page is that "I have great news, but I ain't tellin," entry. It's rather amusing, because it's started several online people in bugging me about what I meant by all that. Well, here I was thinking that it was kind of self-explanatory. Am I gonna have to write another one of those "Everything ain't yo' business," entries? Jeez.

Anyway, to clear up some things that people might think I was talking about, I'll mention a few things that It's not, in the order of what people probably think I'm talking about.

1. Frank and I are not dating. If we were, I'd gladly mention that.
2. I haven't gotten a better job. The entire free world would know if I got a better job. Just trust me on that one.
3. I did not find my father. Realistically, I don't know if I'd talk about that one online either....
4. I'm not having hot, lustful sex with a woman. I'm sure someone imagined that one. Hell, I'm imagining it now.
5. I'm not getting married to someone I've only known for three months. Sorry, that's been a trend among my friends lately.
6. I'm not pregnant. If I haven't been having sex, how on earth am I gonna have a baby??
7. I didn't secretly join the mafia. Do I have to remind you people that I'm black for this one, or what?
8. I didn't just come into millions of dollars. If I had millions of bucks, I wouldn't have to write about it on my piddley little journal--- I'd be on the fucking news, telling my ex-employer to kiss my ass.

Okay, that was fun to write. It's actually kind of fun to have a smidgen of mystery about me again. Before this whole, tell everyone everything about me phase, I used to be pretty cool, in that I wouldn't tell anyone shit. I think I might go back to that old me for a little while. Besides, what I'm not telling the world sure is worth shutting the fuck up. Well, I have a meeting in a few minutes, so I gotta go.

Love and adoration,

Pam

Written, Monday, Oct. 14, 2002 at around: 1:27 AM

there's no sex in the champagne room.Sorry, it sounded like a good title.

Man,

I'm not asleep. You know, today was a strange day. I didn't really do much, nor did I even really clean my apartment. I've been meaning to get around to it, but that's always a fuitle argument with my brain.

Soooo, um, what is there to talk about? The un-boyfriend? The shitty job? My need for some more lotion at my desk at work? I don't have too much cool stuff to say that hasn't already been said.

Today was one of those days where I started suspecting people of reading my journal. Several other human beings were a little too perceptive about what's going on in my life. Especially a few hours/minutes after the entry below was posted. Man, I don't know. I should just start asking motherfuckers if they read this, that way I can be assured of my level of assholeness.

The other day, I almost considered closing up miabogard.diaryland.com forever. Then I thought about it, and I realized that I get too much fun out of reading my guestbook entries, reading my traffic reports, and changing my layouts. It's all an attention thing, and I live for that shit.

Oh man... when am I gonna get laid?!?!?

lkjdsakjlsfdkjl;sdknmsd, .r4e9iiorriiu u xol

Sorry-- that was me banging my head on my keyboard out of sexual frustration. I'll be okay. Well, it's like, one thirty. I need to get my ass in bed, and write a long paper-journal entry. Wish me luck.

Love and adoration,

Pam

Written, Sunday, Oct. 13, 2002 at around: 10:39 PM

Hell the fuck yeah.

Hell the fuck yeah.

I've tried about three times to find a tasteful way to write this entry. I've obviously failed each time. There's great news, which is a cause for celebration, and preperation. The problem is, I'm not 100 percent sure if I should share this glorious news.

See, this is one of those tests of my level of morality. I've told one person about this, thus far-- well one and 1/2. Both of them very impartial, and somewhat removed from this great news. But that still leaves me with the crucial delemma: Do I write about this great news in my journal? The same journal that my friends read, my closer co-workers read, and is avalible to the entire world- will it be home to some personal, yet terribly exciting news?

I doubt it.

It's really burning my brain, because any frequent reader of my diary will tell you that I enjoy bitching about every aspect of my life. Keeping anything, and I means anything, from myself, or the humans who read this journal is a bit difficult. I'll write about this in my paper journal, but it's not as fun, nor as dangerous as writing it here where everyone can read it.

I guess I'm a good person, in a way, for not spouting all of my, and other people's, bees wax all over the internet. Well, I'm going to go celebrate my joyous event over a bit of creativity. I'm going to go draw something.

Love and adoration,

Pam