The week is ova!

Hi!

Ah, so the week does indeed end on fridays. You know, this morning, when I looked at the package of tokens (that my mommy gave me, lol) that had been getting my ass to work all week, I completly flipped out. There were only two tokens left out of a ten pack, and I was like, "Oh god... how am I gonna get to work tomorrow??" This was because at around 8 this morning I thought today was thursday.

Even when you're employed, sometimes days run together. Well, no they don't I'm just a little absent from time to time.

Yesterday I did, in fact, take my mom's glasses back to the office. I felt bad, and figured that I might as well trek back to give them to her while I was still in town. Especially as nice as she's been to me lately. In fact, everyone has been really nice to me lately. Well, okay, both the people I know born near the pisces aquarius cusp have been nice to me. :-D But that's what they do.

My mom is slowly being less of a jerk. At least for the time being. She's learning to have nice conversations with me about Frank, and she's trying to be a better person about it, which makes me feel all warm and fuzzy, or some good emotion. Maybe it's because everything else around her is all wacky right now. The more I tell her about my boyfriend, the more she kinda likes him, because you know, he's a nice person. Sadly, I don't think either of them will ever "kick it," "chill," or "get down" in person, because they're both pretty tempremental people. That's fine with me, though because I wouldn't wanna subject anyone to time with my mom. Hell, I don't spend unintentional time with her. :-P Why do you think I left home when I didn't really have anywhere to live?? I love her very much (much more since I moved away), but sometimes she does and says things that aren't very nice.

Yeah, mothers day is coming. That's a weird holiday for me. I wanna get her something and show her that I do aprecaite all the things she does, but then I remember all the bullshit, and just feel like giving her a dollar-store card with a smiley face sticker that has, "Be nice," written underneath it.

I do wanna do something for her anyway, because she's been really good lately, and she is a good mom... sometimes. Plus she's going through a rough time. I feel rotten because I don't have any money to get her anything. I'll draw her a nice picture, and go visit her or something. Who knows.

Anyway, she's really depressed and upset because my pop-pop isn't doing so well health wise. He's gonna die soon. He's got cancer all up in his lungs and whatnot. She had another stroke the other day. She wasn't hospiltalized or anything, but yeah, she had another. It's like, she stresses herself out so much to the point where her brain can't handle it. Crazy stuff. Mom's had probabally around 8 or 9 strokes. She's not paralyized or anything, she still gets around, and makes time to spread her love, joy, and occasional racist remarks. She's a fighter and whatnot.

So there's a person born in that pisces-aquarius cusp. Here's one you guys are more familiar with hearing about:

Frank took me to see X2 yesterday, which was a really cool movie, but somebody dies in the end (Yes, you're right, I should shut up with letting random movie stuff leak, sue me.) What's with that lately-- having people die at the end of movies?!? Well, anyway, I'm not going to go into detail about the plot of the movie, because although it was good, I just don't have a lot to spend online. It was about the X-men, that's all I got.

lol

So, here's the scoop. I went home after work yesterday, and text-messaged Frank (yeah, my mommy bought me minutes for my cell phone so it works again... yay!) to see how he was doing, and if he was feeling better. Aperently he was doing okay, because he was like, "Let's go see x-2!" It was really cool, too- he was kinda impromptu about it, which was fun. :-D He was still kinda sick, but he came outta the house anyway, which was uber nice of him.

Anyway, we went to a really nice, really clean, really huge theater in Jersey. The ride up there was so beautiful. New Jersey really is a beautiful place, even in the daytime. So we see the movie and everything which was fun, and free (thank you game stop), and basically went home afterwords. I had fun... I'm guessing he did too, but the poor guy is still all sick. :-(

It'd be cool if I lived closer to him, then I could go over his house uninvited, and make him soup or something, lol. Wait, he doesn't like soup...

Right.

Anyway, I'll pester him again today, because that's what I do, and I like to think that I do it well.

Oh, you may have noticed that Stacy is gone. I had to change it, because it's kinda taboo to look at a woman in her undies at the library. How pathetic. Anyway, stewie is fun, and I adore that picture. Isn't he deliciously evil? Mwahahah!

Oh my god-- I'm in the education section of the library today, and I just looked up at the books shelved in front of me. There's a whole row of books at about my eye-level all on homeschooling. LOL, the Idiot's Guide to Homeschooling.

Yeah, I don't know if I've mentioned it much on here (and now I will) but I was homeschooled. I always talk about college and whatnot, but I rarely get into that here. Well here we go (time allowing, of course). Well, I was a bright kid, and no, I don't know what happened. So bright, that I wasn't accepted into any schools, as I was reading like a 4th grader when I was like 5 or something like that. So my mom homeschooled me.

Yes, that does explain why I'm so socially retarded, and it also explains my frequent disregard for social standards. I do what I wanna, because I don't know no better. Well, that's a lie, I know better, it's just that nine times outta ten I don't care.

Ugh, is this gonna be one of those emotional entries? Blech... Yo-- I butchered a couple more songs the other night, and they're pretty funny. Hopefully I'll remember to either burn a disk-- wait, there's no cd drives on this comptuer... nevemind on that- or just write them down and copy them here. Or I could copy them to my other journal, which I'm still debating posting here.

I don't think anyone cares but me, so I'll leave a test link for you guys to follow here Ha ha ha, just kidding, here it is-- seriously. I really do want feedback and whatnot... that's why I post that stuff there. :-P

You can thank Amanda for this link: funny, and not scatlovers. Yes, that is philadelphia, for all of yous guys who don't know from that.

Well, I gotta go... More entry from me on monday.

Love and adoration,

Pam

Written, Thursday, May. 08, 2003 at around: 12:51 PM

Things forgotten and whatnot

Howdy there,

Well, it's afternoon time, which means time for an entry. I went to work this morning, and did my job. It's a very easy job, the more that I do it. They don't hover over me all day which allows me to take my time (read: goof off) while I'm working. Since I'm a fast typist, I can fake like I'm doing work all day. Life isn't so bad.

Anyway, yesterday no movie was seen. Frank wasn't feeling well. It always bugs me when he's not feeling physically well, because there isn't much that I can do to help. I mean, I can call/check up on the guy, and try to make him smile, but there's not much I can do about the flu. I'm not a vaccine. Well, at least I wasn't as last I checked. :-( Poor guy.

I just stayed at home. I don't have money, so I tend not to go anywhere, which is kind of shitty, because now that I have a job, it feels like I should be able to go somewhere after work. Well, I could, but once I got there, what would I do, nothing? I might as well stay at home, where I can do nothing without having to walk anywhere, and everything is free.

I come here (the library) which I guess isn't so bad. I accidentally stole... I mean... took my mom's reading glasses. I'll probabally go back up to the office before I head home, and give them back to her. By probabally I mean, I won't, and she'll get them tomorrow.

Ah, right now feels good. I'm not terribly happy or anything, but I'm seriously un-depressed. There's a slight amount of meaning to my life, which gives me a reason to do things. Plus, that encourages me to meddle in other peoples lives, which has become a hobby of mine over the years. I haven't had any complaints yet.

Although not at the top of the list titled, "Lives to Meddle With," Jen (eric's jennifer... damnit I have to update the glossary) needs a larger interjection of me in her life. Heh. Seriously, though-- I think that I'm going to work on her a little. I also have some plans for a certian boyfriend of mine, but he ought to like them. He hasn't complained yet. But I suppose I should wait on meddling with him until he's feeling better. Mwahahahah.

Damnit, I hate it when this happens... Throughout the 24 hour span between these entries, I'll think of interesting things to write about, and my ironic little observations. By the time that I sit down in front of the damn computer, those observations are all but a commercial break that was long forgotten. That means that I end up writing about stuff as it comes to me, which sometimes is cool, but I'm never really satisfied with it. I guess it doesn't really matter in the long run anyway, because a journal is nothing but a self-serving creation anyway.

I do apreciate that people read it though, because deep down, it lets me know that you crazy bastards care. That, or you're just really bored when you get on the internet around 1am. Yes, I know who visits, as well as when and how long. Mwahahaha, part two.

Well I've been writing for almost a half an hour, so my time here is done. Wow, a half hour is so short. :-( I gotta pay my damn cable bill.

Love and adoration,

Pam

Written, Wednesday, May. 07, 2003 at around: 1:07 PM

A nooner/quickie

Yeeeah,

So it's one in the afternoon. I'm at the library, and ironically, so is the Current miss philadelphia. The library is having some kind of function, and she's here spreading light and joy. Damnit, that kind of makes me want to bone up for the contest next year, and try again.

Work was work. Not bad, not terribly good either. I've gotta hurry up and finish here at the library, because I gotta get home. :-D

Well, I'm feeling good about myself for a change, so the day should be a fairly good one. There's also a plan to go see X2 with Frank this afternoon, so I'm a little excited. Yay!

Looking at Miss Philly (who I met, and is a very nice girl) I'm feeling a bit of the green monster, which is a great motivator for me. I think I'm getting a big case of the go-getters, and it's about that time of year for me to start doing things on a whim again. Plus, I should have a -very- small amount of spending money soon, which will allow me to do all of those on-a-whim kinda things that I miss so dearly.

Okay, well, sorry for the terribly shitty entry, but I really want to see my boyfriend and this movie. Gotta go!

Love and adoration,

Pam

Written, Tuesday, May. 06, 2003 at around: 12:30PM

1/2 hour isn't very long!!

Well, here we go,

Went to work today. Stared at small print, and a computer screen. Liked it. Ate too much junk food. Tummy hurt a little. Slept too much during the previous day. Slept too little this morning. Feel a little tired.

That about sums it up.

Anyway, I don't have the ability to just chill out online like I used to, so I've found myself doing just the essentials. At the library you're only given about a half hour to use the internet-capible computers. So I have to budget my time checking email, looking at cnn.com (Which does have a link to SportsIllustrated.com, via their sports section, thank you very much) and updating this thing. As I learned during the blogathon, 1/2 hour is not a very long period of time.

Life-lessons are often found in unlikely places.

I'm really exausted, which is kinda funny because I only work for about 5 hours a day. I woke up at 6, though, which is totally unnatural for me. I'm gonna have to find a way to get around this whole "Waking up early" thing. There probabaly isn't a way, but I'll try.

So, hmmm... yesterday, what'd I do? Well, I came home, changed my clothes and slept for a while. Then Frank came past for a little while, and left... mostly 'cause there's no cable tv at my house. Well, at least there wasn't yesterday. There is now, lol. Anyway, frank only stayed for a little while, but in my partially-awake observation, he seemed okay. He's a funny guy... I like him.

So, after he left, I tried going back to sleep, 'cause I hadn't hit REM yet anyway. That didn't work, because about 10 minutes after frank left, John called me. He talked at me for a while, and ended up ditching the phone conversation for Mad About You-- which is his favorite tv show, by the way. :-D

So, I'm like-- cool, back to my nap. No dice. Moly, who I don't think is in my glossary, called me. Moly is indeed one of my internet-found friends. She's from Washington DC and we've actually hung out in person, and we're quite a pair. Imagine two black girls, who laugh a lot, talk a mile a minute, and both sound caucasian. That'd be us. We make a good team too, because we work well together verbally. It's hard to discribe without sounding too goofy, so I'll leave it up to you guys to make your own assumptions. And no, she isn't bi, a lesbian or otherwise. In fact, Moly is one of the few female friends I have who I don't have any sort of sexual attraction to. That should make her feel good, 'cause she's all uber Christian and stuff.

She's also a Republican, but I like her anyway.

Anyway, Moly's in town at this very moment on some buisness thingy. We were gonna hang out, but we're both quite lazy, and it was rainy yesterday. I doubt we'll do anything today either, because it's cold outside, and she didn't pack many warm clothes. That's probabally a good thing, because I'm tired, and would like to get my nap on when I go home. I doubt I'll actually get a nap, as I know how my friends work, and they don't like me to get rest. Especially if they haven't been resting.

Otherwise, I don't have any plans for anything to do in the near future. I do plan to get some kareoke time in soon. OH MAN... why, when we were all bored and whatnot at john's family shindig, did frank go, "I know what you're doing when you get paid," and mentioned karaoke. Damnit. That's all I've been thinking about since he said that. Well, okay, I've thought about other things, like eating, and putting my left food down in front of my right foot-- but you get the picture.

I need karaoke in my life. It isn't a want. It's not just a fleeting desire. I have a serious need. I have an addiction, and I'm starting to feel the damn hives, shakes, and cold sweats man.

LOL, I need help.

Okay, I'm gonna go now, because I'm not getting kicked out right now, however, I want to get some more stuff done online.

Love and adoration,

Pam

Written, Monday, May. 05, 2003 at around: 2:09 PM

the 400th entry... it's not that cool

This is the all awaited, and desired 400th entry.

It really isn't going to be very exciting.

It's early afternoon on a monday, and it feels like quite a tired/do nothing day. This morning was spent working for about 6 hours straight, a recent record. The library is filled with people who want to use computers, so it took a while to find an open one. The one that was found is in the health department. I guess medical students have better libraries at their own schools.

Anyway, I'm terribly exausted. Yesterday, I woke up at 7am because I was supposed to go do some scenes with the Love Hurts crew. I ended up not going. Sadly, I didn't get a chance to go back to sleep. That was the whole point of not going. I remained awake for the rest of the day, talking to sharee, doing errands, trying to make my hair not suck, and going to a Crazian Family Function.

Jesus.

Okay, John's sister invited Frank to go to her daughter's first holy communion reception. John's nice, the girl who the party was for (which is obvious if you read the previous sentance) is half Italian (her poppa) and half Philipino (Her momma, who is john's older, and very pretty, sister). It was a very south-philly-italian kinda party. They had meatballs, and pasta, and italian wedding-style cake. It felt like I was catering again... but no italian guys tried grabbing my ass. At least not that I knew of. Anyway... Them crazy catholics have parties for everything. Why have a reception for eating a stale cracker and some grape juice? Whatever, that's not my bag man.

Heh, I said crackers.

Anyway, Frank was given an actual invitation, and last week, John asks me to go too. I agreed. That was my first mistake.

The actual party wasn't so bad, like minus the lack of fun, and the fact that I don't get down with religon, italian men, or old people. But as far as family gatherings go it was to be expected. For whatever reason, people always invite me to family their gatherings. Well, at least they used to. Leighann would invite me to stuff, Erica always opens her doors to me at thanksgiving, and Sharee is still trying to get me to come over for one of her family's sunday dinners. I think it's because they pity me, and my lack of familyness. John's reasons for inviting us were a little more realistic. He didn't want to go through that alone.

Normally, I know more people at these kinds of functions, allowing me to mingle, but the only people I knew there were Frank and John, so I stayed at the table all evening. That's very unlike me, but between the crazy-rythmless Catho-italians and the non-partiing chill-Philipinos, it really wasn't my crowd. So I sat next to Frank, and we laughed at drunk people, and looked at asses.

It's weird being at a party and not knowing anyone. For whatever reason, I expected that John was goigng to introduce Frank and I to the people at the party that he knew. He sorta introduced us to his immediate family, but other than that... nope. I had met John's sister before, but I really don't know the woman. Looking back on it, I could have just randomly introduced myself to people, but my social-butterfly-ness really wasn't gonna do any good anyway. It was a really segregated party... John's Philipino family didn't seem to want anything to do with the Itailan people on the other side of the room.

Yup.

Well, hopefully the next family gathering that I attend, or the next time I meet one of my friend's families, it'll be a little more jovial.

Otherwise, the weekend was fairly normal. There were other things that happened, but I really don't feel like remembering details from over 24 hours ago at the moment.

LMAO-- the current Pieces of You topic is "What is your idea of a perfect date?" I had a great idea for an entry, but I'm not writing that at the library. :-D No... seriously, I don't know what to write for that. I could write something dirty and erotic, but I think that's cheating, 'cause fuckin' does not a date make, no matter how much I argue otherwise.

Oh, on the "No one cares but me" tip, I finally remembered what my password was for my email. Yay!

Yeah, so I didn't think of anything creative for my 400th entry. Even though I'm sure I've written well over 400 entries. Whatever. I'm gonna go now, because My time is limited at the library. So is life.

Love and adoration